At 22 after Mum passed on and my family and I refusing to adhere to African Traditions/Culture that were anti-scripture e.g I was asked to know (In a Biblical manner of Genesis 3) sexually a family friend as a way of freeing my sister who was married to continue having intimacy with her hubby. Which I declined with a smile and due to this "my tribesmen"(Luo Community).
There are 44 Current Tribes in Kenya and Luo is one of them,so they had to abandon us and the entire facade of arranging for her funeral.
If I back for a moment here,I had fasted for 21 days for the recovery of my late mum only that the day I broke the first it's the same time I had an impression in my heart that the burden of trying to armtwist God for those 21 days with my Prayers and fasting. After I broke the fast that's the moment I was told that she was dead. Many family members wanted to come and bark commands at us the nuclear family on how to conduct the funeral as per their past. Though being the son while she was seriously ill she had tasked me to ensure that she was buried in Nakuru and no other place which was a major issue in this whole facade.
So when I refused all their suggestions they even went to an extent of threatening that after her burial I was the next one. I asked brethren to Pray for me and with me.
After all this Facade had died down I was left nursing bitterness against God,how could He let me fast for 21 Days and at the end of the fast He takes her away.
For the next couple of months I was going to Church grudgingly,praying grudgingly,and did all religious duties grudgingly. I like many people out there wanted a God that did according to my plans and will which would make him an Idol.
"A god that does all you tell and expect from him/it is a perfect definion of an Idol".
I actually never moved on from this belief till the Doctrine of the Sovereignty of God was taught me that's when I repented(Changed to be changed as Don Lynch normally puts it. I insulted and spoke rudely to those who and even disrespected my elders. I repented and am still working to mend things with some whom we had a fallout.
When I was a child,I spoke as a child,I thought as a child:but when I became(though am a work in progress) a man, I put away childish things.
Jesus not only fixed it, He fixed me as well. Am no longer bitter but better.